Mending a Shattered Heart,


Stefanie Carnes Ph.D., ed.



from Ch. 7  What can The Twelve Steps Do For Me?

 by Mavis Humes Baird



·        Which meeting should I attend?

·        Can I attend the same meeting as the addict?

·        What is anonymity?

·        How do I identify myself during meetings?

·        Do I have to speak during the meeting or can I just listen?

·        What if I’m a male co-addict and the 12-step meetings for co-addicts in my town do not allow men?

·        I’m embarrassed and afraid I might see someone I know.

·        Understanding Addiction Terms

·        What is powerlessness?

·        What is detachment?

·        Why are these recovery concepts so difficult?
How can I ever hope to break free from this depressing nightmare?

·        Why do 12-step fellowships work?

·        How much work does recovery involve?

·        How do I “work” a program?

·        Will the 12 steps teach me about boundaries and accountability?

·        What is a sponsor?

·        Will finding a sponsor be difficult?

·        Do the 12 steps help with couples’ issues?

·        How will my religious beliefs be affected by working the program?

·        What if I don’t feel a connection with my group?

.      Do co-addicts relapse?




With chapters by:

Mavis Humes Baird

Patrick Carnes

Stefanie Carnes

Barbara Levinson

Joe Kort

Sonja Rudie

Paul and Virginia Hartman

Omar Minwalla

Jennifer Schneider 

Cara Tripodi 

Robert Weiss